Saturday 22nd October 2016

The Honeymoon!

‘Your call is very important to us, please hold for the next available agent’ twenty minutes later – ditto – 20 minutes later – ditto.  This was Europcar help centre, Bob’s attempts at two other numbers for Europcar Newquay were permanently engaged and permanently unanswered.

The attempts to contact Europcar were made by Bob in the middle of a noisy and chaotic South Terminal at Gatwick as the 14.10 flight to Newquay had been cancelled.  Bob was keen to inform Europcar of the delay.

Bob and Marcia had waited patiently to check in their heavy bags, fought their way through security including removing hiking boots and settled down in a noisy coffee shop for ‘information’  the ‘information’ for flight BE804 was a 10 minute delay ‘More info at 14.10’ – no problem they thought. 14.10 came and went and then ‘Please go to the Airline Desk’ came up – now what thought Bob as he finished his coffee.  Sixty people all descended on the Airline Desk all with their own individual anxiety’s and concerns.  ‘What’s going on?’ ‘ Terribly sorry the aircraft has had a fault and the flight has been cancelled’ ‘There is a flight at 20.10 but seats are limited so it’s a first come first served situation – this is the number to call’.  Immediately all those in earshot dialled the number including Bob who surprisingly got through and secured 2 seats on the 20.10.

‘What was that?’ shouted somebody from the back,  back came the reply that ‘the 14.10 flight has now been reinstated for 18.40 and all those booked on the 20.10 will be transferred back to the 18.40 but first we must get you all out of security and collect your hold bags which are being returned to baggage reclaim. And by the way all those of you who have purchased duty free goods have to return them’.  Disbelief was the look from those carrying smart carrier bags.

A yellow lady appeared and said follow me but didn’t seem concerned that only Bob and Marcia followed, the other 58 disappeared.  The yellow lady also disappeared in the baggage reclaim area leaving no information as to where the bags might re-appear, carousel number 5 suddenly burst into life and surprisingly disgorged the lost bags.  At this point Bob had a strong desire to retrieve the car from the Long Stay car park and get the hell out of the Gatwick environs and drive to Newquay instead.

Marcia being a little less impatient persuaded him to recycle the bags back to the check in and wait for the 18.40, OK thought Bob but much against his instincts.  Back at the check in surprisingly most fellow passengers reappeared in a large blob causing chaos around adjacent check-in desks ‘Please form a queue within the tapes’ came the cry but totally unheeded much to the annoyance of all those checking in to Bahrain.

A second battle through security, including ‘remove hiking boots’ didn’t exactly help the blood pressure but thoughts of the Treglos Hotel on Constantine Bay were now coming into the forefront of Bob and Marcia’s minds.  Despite many irate, annoyed and resigned passengers round about Bob was somewhat impressed that Flybe had managed to produce another aircraft from somewhere to get us all to Newquay, nevertheless thoughts of large amounts of compensation entered Bob’s head despite the plastic cards worth £12.40 issued to all delayed passengers for ‘a meal!’ at any of the Gatwick eating establishments.  On arriving at the final check in before boarding all systems seemed to be down as check in was only achieved by interminable button pressing as obviously the system wasn’t programmed for all those booked on three flights to the same place on the same day.

Take off finally occurred at 19.33, precisely 5 hours and  23 minutes late, good enough for substantial compensation thought Bob.  Stone the crows a mere 37 minutes later the Embraer 195 landed at Newquay and surprise, surprise Europcar failed to deliver the car.  Why? Because they closed the office at 18.30 of course and to hell with all those who experienced problems and couldn’t get in touch.  ‘Your call is very important to us???

Bob collected the car the next day, didn’t make a fuss and tried to forget the previous day.  That evening Bob and Marcia finally relaxed with a glass of bubbly in front of the roaring log fires at the Treglos Hotel contemplating what happened during the 50 year delay in their Honeymoon.

The flight delay incidentally meant that the pair missed their first dinner but in true Treglos fashion the kitchen came up with two boards of cold platter heaving with a variety of fish, meats and salad all delivered to their room by an efficient young man , Bob tipped generously with his last £1.37.  However eating after 9.30 is never a good idea.

Dressed for breakfast the pair ambled down to the bright and spacious restaurant and were confronted with a dizzying array of cereals, fruit, croissants, jams, juices and all shades of milk.  A full English plus any combination you can think of is also available. Conversations with fellow guests are usually on the banal side but Marcia did her best to respond to a ‘really’ elderly couple (probably younger than Bob or Marcia) who lost no time in telling their life story, which, among other things was looking after the historic Marconi wireless station on the Lizard, Bob being a touch interested mentioned that he had done his apprenticeship with the Plessey company on experimental under water communications.   Bob and Marcia heard no more from their neighbours!

After breakfast Bob’s taxi arrived on time at 10.30am to take him and his Tom Tom back to the airport to collect the car.  A young lady at the Europcar desk always on the defensive completed the formalities handed Bob the key to a Hyundai i20 which had an over sensitive clutch, oversensitive brakes but went like a rocket.  Bob without Marcia on the road is something to be avoided.

A stunning day weather wise was spent ambling around the local area including the magnificent Constantine Bay.  There are of course probably hundreds of magnificent beaches and vistas in Cornwall but Constantine Bay in gin clear conditions with an off shore wind whipping the tops off the towering breakers takes some beating.